Saturday, October 4, 2008

They've taken my thoughts

Confused tonight. thoughts telling me I need to be doing something anything with life, with this night with this weekend, times wasting when I should be doing IT.

Thinking about appointment I had with shrink - Am I better now. Was I ever ill , can't remember at mo, can't remember at the moment. Think they made it up, want to get me to make me into their patient. They say I tried to kill myself but I don't remember this, so how can I be sure.

I had hopes for myself hopes for life when I was young. I was a high achiever I was supposed to be someone to be a success. But I don't remember that me, I don't remember much. Forgetiing things. How did I get here. I know I was under crisis team for 10 weeks and nearly hospitalised, because I am told, not because I remember these things. I am going to get my medical file. When CC comes around. I want my notes I want the notes they say I wrote to my son, I want to know the truth. So I can remember , So I can know, so I can move on.


Mandy said...

Hi Lareve

Hmmmm.....want to write something useful but all I can say is I used to have ambitions and thought I was achieving and being an upright citizen and all that shite.

Don't lose sight of whatever it is you want or dream of. So, these things may not happen but they might.

Sending hugs because am as much use as bottom-less bucket in a flood.


La-reve said...

Thanks Mandy,

much appreciated