Thursday, January 1, 2009

A clean slate

Well 2008 went out with a bang. Well more of a botched OD and a sickly hazy New Years eve. Yesterday I spent the day feeling sick and emotionally drianed, after only getting back from A and E at 3.30am ,after being discharged for crisis Team intervention.

Yesterday the duty worker from my CMHT and someone from Crisis came to see me, they asked if I needed some extra support over next week. I said I didn't know I just feel hazy. Anyway my following admission that nothing can help etc, etc made them think a visit friday when partner is back to work and I am on my own might be good. Problem is they couldn't decide whose responsibility I was. Crisis team said that as CMHT are open on friday they should send someone. And CMHT said with CC away, and holiday week they wouldn't be able to. And Crisis nurse said they only supposed to pick up out of hours things. Anyway, this continued for while (not very professional) so I just said I will ok without visit, and they said I can ring and request one if I really need it and they will try and get someone from Crisis to come out. They also tried to coax me back on Quetiapine but I will think about that

That aside, I had some guests over last night. I wasn't looking forward to it. But having people round, meant I was forced into hostess mode, and at least meant I didn't revert to locking myself away crying over 2008. They stayed overnight with 6 month old, so didn;t get ANy sleep what so ever, and house in mess. But it was ok.

I want to try and be positive now, because lets face it if you can't be hopeful on the 1st January then when can you be. My problems didn't evaporate on the stroke of midnight. But I am happy to carefully pack away 2008 and all its crap not to be opened and relived. 2008 was bad, but that was last year. The slate is clean, and I will try and make this year better, as best I can.


Disillusioned said...

That doesn't sound too helpful. Sorry you got caught up in the politics - I agree with you that it doesn't sound as though it was very professional. Keep yourself safe and do call for help if you find you need it.

Lola Snow said...

That sounds about right for the genius combination if the crisis team and the CMHT. Not that I am bitter! I agree with disillusioned though, please call them if you need them, however useless they might appear, any port in a storm. You are worth more than their petty negotiations

As for the rest of the post it made me a happier to read the ending. It sounds as though however down you are feeling, there is a little hope in the relief that the year is over. You have been through enough, I hope 2009 brings you some peace, and some quality of life.

Lola x

La-reve said...

Thanks, you know what MH services are like more than most. Endless politics and mostly theoretical help. However at the moment I need some support - don;t think I'm ready for flying solo.

Genius about sums up to me the 'crisis' teams. they don;t seem to know who are they are supposed to help and when.
the way I see it I have too choices. Dwell on 2008 and doom myself to repeating it. or at least start 2009 with a semi-positive outlook. ( I am still a realist)

Mandy said...

Hi Lareve

I am in non-rant mode so am glad that the get together went well enough for you.

Do hope you get time to relax.


Nick said...

Sorry to hear about your experiences with the services, I don't really know where I stand either, my psychiatrist is telling me off for not seeing a CPN when nobody has even explained to me what that is or how to get one. Everyone I speak to has to have my problems explained to them in full which is extremely mentally draining for me :( Hope you feel a little better soon.

La-reve said...

Thanks Nick

A CPN is a community psychaitric nurse. You normally get assigned one of these if you are under a community Mental health team(CMHT) and under what is called a CPA - Care programme approach. I hope that clears things up a little bit.
Thanks for visiting and comment

La-reve said...

P.S- Noticed you were in Notts. Are you under a community mental health team. And which one. I amy be able to give you more specific advice.

colouredmind said...

That doesnt sound helpful at all. You shouldnt need to hear discussions about which team will visit you, you just need to know that something will happen. The outcome doesnt sound too helpful. Anyway hope you are ok, Hannah X

Nick said...

Thanks La-reve, you've explained more to me in 2 minutes than they have in a year :S Yeah I'm in Nottingham, I've been messed around a bit and after seeing a GP who referred me for monthly appointments with a nurse practitioner of mental health, who then later referred me to see the psychiatrist every few weeks or so. The place I go to is called Rosebery House if that helps? I'm not sure what else because they never tell me anything.

Nick said...

Oops didn't log in to post that. It was actually me, not an imposter :P

La-reve said...

Hi Nick

Rosebury is the CMHT for west of nottingham. If you are under them as I assume you are. You should be under a CPA - care programme approach and have a care-co-ordinator who will be either a social worker or nurse who will co-ordinate your care and maybe visit you at home if needed. I think these are the things you need to ask about at your next appointment. PS- Glad to speak to another Notts service user- thought I was all alone in the city!

Nick said...

Nope you're not the only one here :) I will try to find out what I can next time I see the psychiatrist. I also got a letter about arranging my CBT today which is good news.