Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Breach of confidence- Am I wrong?

Not slept for hours- days. Not fun anymore. feel irritable. anyway.

Saw GP today. Got into surgery and she was running nearly an hour late. Very restless and pacing- everyone staring at me. Got in and CC had spoken to her and explained the situation. I don't know I remember her talking and me not taking in the words in. I do remember her saying 'so you don't feel you want to work at the moment. Wanting. WANTING- I WANT TO WORK> It's not about wanting.

Anyway she gave me a two months sick note so no trip back there for a while.

I feel angry. I tell you why. My CC on the whole since I was transferred to EIP-Early intervention in psychosis team has been excellent. In that I see her regularly she is mostly always contactable, has helped me with bnefits etc and I can assess Shrinky pretty quick. However there is one thing that seriously annoys me.

Anything I discuss which might be considered slightly risky even if over and done with and in the past is repeated to my mum. My mum is a serious worrier and exagerator and I don't want her burdened - in fact I just don't want her to know everything. I am a 28 year old woman with a family of my own must my mum know everything. If she is going to repeat everything back then I might as well talk to my mum and CC might as well go and use her time with someone else.

On new years eve - I took an overdose. I told CC about 24 hours later. I felt fine and was no longer suicidal. I told her not to tell my mum. But she DID. She has done this before. And then this morning she told my mum I had been back on the roof of the multi-storey a few weeks ago. It wasn't with the level of psychosis of last year and my arrests, but my mum now thinks it is.

Is it me- or is this not a breach of codes of conduct and confidentiality. I could understand breach if I am in acute crisis but not as a matter of course and when crisis averted and over with and when I have made it CLEAR I don't want these things discussed.

CC answer to this is she will always discuss with my mum who is somehow deemed my carer where there are risks.

Therefore it is with regret and frustration I have just sent her the following text:

"Dear A. Just wanted to make you aware that I would rather we didn't meet anymore. I appreciate your help but find the use redundant. And in breach of confidence. Thanks."

It is sad. I will miss her. I do feel I probably do need some support- as things are very difficult right now . But I can't tell her anything without it being repeated. And if I can't be honest what's the point. I don't want another worker I liked A, nor do I want to complain - I appreciate what she has done and don't want to get her into trouble. Plus I complained about previous CC and don't want this to add to the difficult patient label.

I don't know. Am I wrong?


David said...

It all sounds quite hard at the moment. I don't have a clue whether your CC should respect confidentiality or not - my personal feeling is that she should. I shall try to find out for you tomorrow. Others might know and get back sooner.

However, I'm sure she won't leave you alone on the basis of a text or email from you. I've done it to my CPN a number of times. He keeps coming back when I'm in a better mood. Sigh. It's the way it is. Saying bye bye in anger is a red flag. We have to be calm, collected and very sanely placid for them to believe us.

I completely agree with your anger at the breach of confidence. But if they have your mother on their books as a carer maybe? then perhaps that is why they are doing it? It has never happened down here in Gloucestershire. Kate was never told squiddily-shite.

Anyway, you have my number - phone if you want an ear. I mean that.

Take care, and we're all looking out for you, La Reve - you are far more substantial as a person than the dream your nom de plume suggests.


La-reve said...

Thanks D. I shall imagine I will get some response tommorow. A text sent after 1 am might raise an eyebrow. watching why did you kill my father now. think it will do nothing to quell my anger.

As for the name. Isn't it all a dream?? Everything, everyone?

David said...

Of course it is. But it's the only dream we'll ever have. So live it.

On less philosophical matters - if you want to get away for a few days, the old offer still stands - though be warned, although you'd have a room to yourself, you'll need to barricade it against my three little boys. (I could fit a lock or bolt). :-) Just say the word.

And don't watch that programme - I'm halfway through and climbing up the walls. Not good for the generally mentally ill. Tarring wholesale.

Remember my offer. Take us up on it if you think it might help.

And wishing you all the hairy chest (damn, first time I've wondered whether to translate that... hairy chest = very best - don't be insulted, please, I'm just being overly indulgent). Dx

LittleFeet said...

Sadly I don't know the answer to your question about confidentiality. That said, I sincerely hope someone who reads your post will be able to help. Failing that, you could give PALS (http://www.pals.nhs.uk/) a try.

Anonymous said...

I only know that I have to get a lot of pieces of paper and signatures if I want to get anything out of support-workers on behalf of clients, but I know that's not the same as them disclosing stuff to a close family member. I imagine confiding in them is a bit of a grey area. Still, you are not a child and she should respect your wishes. I don't see the need for her to discuss these things with your mum unless she thinks you're in iminent danger (and even so - what's she supposed to do). In my opinion, there should have been some ground rules about this kind of thing when you first discussed your care. It seems wrong to me, and disrespectful. I might be able to quiz one of our advocates for you but I'm off work today as my daughter's ill.
Sorry I can't be more help. Just thought I'd offer sympathies on the interference. I hate the way that one's life ceases to be fully one's own once we've suffered mental-illness.
I really hope you can sort this out amicably. It's a shame to lose someone you have a rapport with and have to find someone else. It does sound like you need the support though, so don't shut them all out!