Sunday, November 9, 2008

I got this feeling, a feeling I can't describe a feeling something bad is lurking. A feeling I can't expell. An anxious feeling, a feeling of confusion. I just want to stop feeling and rest and sleep, but there never is any rest there never can be.


Mandy said...

Hi Lareve

Have read this and your previous posting.

You know my views of the NHS...or more my overall experiences with dealing with it but, and this is a purely personal view, I would err on the side of caution before discharing yourself from any care they might offer.

I do understand your frustration. If I could pick the care I get, then I would see the care co-ordinator every 6 months or only when I felt I needed to see them. Would seek out the psychiatrist only in regards to issues over long term use of sedatives and what if anything else the pharma companies have produced that could replace it and still be as effective. The only part of my care package that I would keep as is is the weekly visits by my Support Worker because she is actually offering me practical support and we chat (and it makes much more sense than anything other care workers have said to or done for me).

Whatever works for individuals is fine by me but I have the greatest reservations about MH services and the morals of pharmateutical companies (and the crap they produce)...also gotta clock that the government hasn't actually decently budgetted for MH care in a very long time. It's a rather hotch potch of a mix that hits the right spot for some but is lacking for many.

Whatever you decide..then hope that works out to be the best decision for you.

As for the Depakote. When I have had nasty side effects, the MH professionals have always advised me to stick with it until it gets better. Sadly, on most ocassions it never got better but again, it does for some.

Now the first sign of something iffy on the side effects front and I am off.

I actually gave the Abilify 2 months. I think that was more than enough time for it to have started to do something beneficial to my psyche or whatever chemical imbalance they reckon I have.

Don't go running off honey. You will only get there to find all the stuff still with you.

Would advise staying home and trying to find something that either relaxes or destracts (both would be good).

Go easy x

Jessica said...

Hi, I know what you mean about having a bad feeling lurking around. It's the feeling and no amount of logical analysis can make it go away.

hang in there and stay safe.