Saturday, June 6, 2009

A blip

Well Shrink has swapped the risperidone for quetiapine from last night 300mg initially. Am very tired as result today, hit a blip. Feel so shit hate this damn illness, I have a diagnosis a label now but it all means nothing- NO LAREVE you are wrong it means a lifelong balancing of well being of being stressed and letting it go that little bit to far into mania or depression. It means a lot of pills , maybe a lifetime of them. And for what. So I can live never to my full potential but like a plant half shadowed shadowed by this malfunction.

I counted today.

31 sleeping pills
20-30 other prescribed meds
48 paracetamol.

The slope is a slippery one and I am on the precipitice


kitchensink said...

I hope that's not a day's dose (in particular the paracetemol!).
Don't worry so. You'll get used to duckin and divin.
But you're right - it is a lifetime of tipping and balancing the scales.
Keep yourself in mind - always.

La-reve said...

Thanks for popping by ad commenting Kitchensink. I know i have to get used to this now but seems futile.

eccedentesiat said...

Quetiapine is never fun although I do find the extended release to be a lot better in terms of being able to stay awake.

Take care you (((hugs))) xxx
We're here to help

Abysmal Musings said...

Thinking of you dear. Keep dodging and weaving. It's a dance. Take care, Dx

Mandy said...

So sorry haven't come here before now, Lareve

Have been on planet zog but do understand where you are at.

It's muddling through its most basest level.

Hugs from here and just in case you feel you don't want to lay your crap on someone else...don't worry about that. Your crap is distraction from my crap. Email or buzz anytime.