Since monday I was in hospital again. After my overdose of Lorazepam I had a review on the monday and it was decided that with my low mood and recent events I was too risky to be in the community. Same old really crap food, hard beds boring, boring , boring..Hourse spent staring at walls
I really am the revolving door patient at the moment. I am only out because I convinced my boyfriend to veto the section 3 for a treatment order for uo to six months.
Two doctors and a social worker thought I should be in hospital for up to six months. What does that tell you La-reve? Your ILL,Seriously, time to face the light of day. Yet I still think I am fine, I take there pills not because I think I'm ill but out of fear of their wards. What should I do with myself? Four admisissions in three months. But no, I know better. Hmm and they won't give me any benzo and am edgy and jittery , but when I do have the benzos then am a sedated zombie. I just want to live, a normal, balanced, average life. Is that too much? -To go back before IT arrived. Want to smash it out of me, cut it away but it is me and I am it. so to erradicate it would be to erradicate me~? Not sure, off to search for a benzo.
7 comments:
Hi Lareve
The revolving door and the creaking one. Ha! ha!
Hope other people come on to offer you rays of sunshine. personal experiences that helped them through and anything positive.
I am off for a long bath. Perhaps I can sink a few chattering monkeys in there.
Hugs xx
Sounds like an utter nightmare.
No real rays of sunshine to offe - it's pretty overcast here (literally and metaphorically). Small furries are keeping me going at the mo.
I find chocolate helpful and cookies and... chocolate cookies?
Hope you feel better soon.
Take care,
Differently
Sorry to hear that :( Sending positive thoughts your way, I really hope you feel better soon.
Sending you my best wishes, as ever.
I made a large harvest-jug last week, and I scrawled your Camus quote on it.
I'll send you photos.
Take care, and I hope it will stop revolving with you left where you want to be v v soon.
Dx
Photo
Not on revolving door for now at home. Hoping to stay here.
D- I love that jug perfectly crafted. if lived nearer would ask for a production ;0)
Sorry things aren't going well. Hopefully they will come up with a treatment plan that works! I know what you mean about taking meds so you can stay out, I took them so I showed willing, I never wanted to.
Thinking of you.
Post a Comment